pastor

Via: Pastor Dwain Miller
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Pastor Dwain Miller from El Dorado, Arkansas claims that Pokémon are using demonic powers to possess children everywhere; and that at one point he even saw some kid lose the ability to walk or speak, with black soot runnin' out his eyes, nose, and mouth.
Alriiighty, then.

Via: CasperTheFriendlyToast
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New Jersey Pastor Eric Dammann is using his fist to force God's will upon his people.

In a sermon that reportedly dates back to July but has recently gone viral, Damann says he met a kid named Ben in Calgary who was a "smart aleck."

He wasn't taking the Lord seriously, so he did what any peaceful man of God would do and knocked him to the ground.

"So I walked over to him and went, Bam! Punched him in the chest as hard as I could," he said. "I crumpled the kid. I just crumpled him."

He later apologized saying the clip was out of context.

"I do not endorse child abuse or the punching of children," he told The NY Daily News. "My intention in the sermon was to make a point of how God can use our mistakes. The viral clip does not show the whole sermon, where I say what I did was wrong."