The Ol' Switcheroo

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The Ol' Switcheroo
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When it comes to getting your daily dose of grains, I can think of no better food to ingest than Methamphetawheat. - Matty Malaprop

Rho, Rho, Rho Your Boat

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Rho, Rho, Rho Your Boat
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Gently down the... protein? I don't know how to rewrite that classic tune in science terms I'M SORRY SORRY EVERYONE I KNOW I'VE FAILED YOU ALL. - Matty Malaprop

The Floodgayts Are Open...

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The Floodgayts Are Open... View Fullscreen
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Do you see what I did there? Over there, in the title? GOD I'M CLEVER. - Matty Malaprop

They Are Innately Scientific Animals

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They Are Innately Scientific Animals
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You think just whine because they are begging for food. But in fact they whine because they're calculating the coefficient AND begging for food. - Matty Malaprop

It Tastes a Little... Metallic?

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It Tastes a Little... Metallic?
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Let's be clear: Outside of the literal interpretation of the conjunction of these two symbols, the iPad is in no way, shape or form a thing even remotely as good as an actual apple pie. - Matty Malaprop

Square Root

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Square Root
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If said root was in the shape of an "I," then would that make this tree an imaginary lumber? - Matty Malaprop