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Maybe I'm just too cynical to appreciate love, but I've always felt like weddings are simply mulch ado about nothing. - Matty Malaprop

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The doctors had never seen anything like it before. They even had to coin a new term to describe the situation! - Matty Malaprop

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After reading this groan-worthy pizza puns, I really feel like I could use a margherita. - Matty Malaprop

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And this, children, is what happens when you open your big mouthpieces. - Matty Malaprop

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And this right here is why I always get a little irked when doctors try and get cheeky with their 25 cents worth. - Matty Malaprop