His Blades Bend Like Beckham

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His Blades Bend Like Beckham
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It doesn't matter whether the pun was unintentional due to the product's being manufactured in a non-native English speaking country; this one has me laughing so hard I'm practically balling! - Matty Malaprop

That They're Plural Should Be Telling to Begin With

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That They're Plural Should Be Telling to Begin With
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Though I suppose soccer with two balls would be a rather fascinating game to watch... - Matty Malaprop

GOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL

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GOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL
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Finally, a competitive sport that's right up my Dali! - Matty Malaprop

I Hear This Sport is All the RAGE in Europe...

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I Hear This Sport is All the RAGE in Europe...
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Maybe they're all just upset because they keep stubbing their toes? - Matty Malaprop

He's a Meno Mother on the Pitch!

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He's a Meno Mother on the Pitch!
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Euthyphrootball has never been my personal forté; it always feels like such an athletic trial to me. - Matty Malaprop

This Girl is a Keeper!

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This Girl is a Keeper!
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I mean, she's pretty, funny, intelligent, athletic... but there's something about her that just rubs me the wrong way. Like, she just seems way too possessive sometimes, you know? - Matty Malaprop

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