There's something strange about this soap, but I can't quite put my finger on it... - Matty Malaprop

What? You were expecting Usain? You know that's never how it works here! - Matty Malaprop

Want more London Olympics content? ROFLympics has been awarded the gold medal of awesomeness!

I suppose cleaning battle suits would require a pretty supernatural solvent... - Matty Malaprop

Sure, Jack Coast and Ellie Dove were both great in that show, but I really preferred Coast's work on "As the Loofa Turns." And for that matter I'll just be the first to say that Dove was WAY hotter on "Drains of Our Lives." - Matty Malaprop

... but not a variety I'd like to wash up with any time soon, thankyouverymuch. #SOCREEPY #THEYLOOKLIKEDOLLHANDS - Matty Malaprop

Old and busted: Soap on a rope. New hotness: Soap on a Ring of the Nibelung. - Matty Malaprop