To be fair, that's a very large ice cube, so at least you'll get some good mileage out of it! - Matty Malaprop

Zebras, z-bras, Zaireekas... they're all the same thing, right? - Matty Malaprop

I'm a bit more partial to J-manatees myself, but I suppose this works in a pinch. - Matty Malaprop

After all, we all know Jesus was betrayed by Judas because he really kneaded some dough. - Matty Malaprop

And hopefully sooner than later! The time I've spent with you has been a hoot! - Matty Malaprop

You'd be surprised how sensical this is. The Fibonacci sequence actually acts as a very accurate measure of the way in which humans eat nachos. First you take one, then another one, then another two, then three, then five... and on and on until the plate is empty and you curl up in a fetal position and start weeping wondering what have you done with your life but more importantly WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH ALL THE DELICIOUS NACHOS. - Matty Malaprop

There's something strange about this soap, but I can't quite put my finger on it... - Matty Malaprop