Whenever this guy makes that dopey smile of his, I simply cannot help but King Lear at him. - Matty Malaprop

ARE YOU HAPPY WILLIAM? RICHARD FROZE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR SO-CALLED "RED-TAG SPECIAL!!!!" - Matty Malaprop

Alas, poor Yorick! He was my landlord! - Matty Malaprop

The bard truly had quite a biting wit. - Matty Malaprop

Following great treachery from seedy family members, Hamlet must now Rogaine his position as rightful hair to his father's throne. - Matty Malaprop