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Via Apokalips
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And my parents always told me living on a diet of nothing but Pad See Ew was going to make me a fat loser... looks to me like they just got served! - Matty Malaprop

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Via Reddit
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Listen, I'mma be honest here; if having a moral opposition to long-distance running is wrong, then I never ever want to be right. - Matty Malaprop

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The odds are especially rigged against the hare here given that the tortoise has "you are home" tattooed inside his shell, "Memento"-style. - Matty Malaprop