Preferably a puppy? Oh how I would just LOVE it if you had a puppy! - Matty Malaprop

Apparently no matter how much I mock submitters who just send in cliché crap ad nauseam, I still keep getting cliché crap submissions ad nauseam. AM I DOING THIS WRONG OR SOMETHING?? - Matty Malaprop

They're so well-mannered, they probably wouldn't even call you out on your ogling! - Matty Malaprop