Hey girl, do you want to save the environment? Because my reproductive rig runs on biodiesel! - Matty Malaprop
Me and my friends do this to my roommate everytime he starts humming Dashboard Confessional's "Screaming Infidelities." You'd think he'd have learned by now... - Matty Malaprop
Just a line of vases
I've always been quite partial to puns with this much linearity. - Matty Malaprop
No one ever said the puns I put on this site ever had to make any sense... but maybe they should have, because clearly I'm fond of things like this. - Matty Malaprop
Say what you will, but I still maintain the best ever pickup line is "Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?" - Matty Malaprop
I really love that this joke both is and isn't. It's tautological but also a paradox! WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS I'M A NERD AND I'M READING WAY TOO MUCH INTO THIS DON'T JUDGE ME OKAY GOD YOU'RE ALL SUCH HUGE JERKS! - Matty Malaprop
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