It doesn't hurt that he's basically the big cheese around his office, either. - Matty Malaprop

DON'T CALL THAT NUMBER MAN HE HAS A COMBOVER AND YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHERE THAT COMBOVER HAS BEEN!!!!!! - Matty Malaprop

If they'd only fixed the spacing and alignment on that ad, they wouldn't be having this problem right now. - Matty Malaprop

Sadly, this isn't the first time he sat his pants during an important interview... - Matty Malaprop

So does that make Ashley a... funereal estate agent? - Matty Malaprop

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He spent a good decade working in the banking industry, but a motion within his company to start charging farmers fees for their annual harvests was the last straw.