Reason Number 1,307,248 Not to Trust Craigslist

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Ad,blonde,blue eyes,body,creepy,description,double meaning,face,female,Hall of Fame,internet,literalism,lolwut,model,personal
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The part of her ad this comic doesn't show is the creepiest part of all: "I've got the love of a thousand hearts to give you, and I can offer you ass for days..." - Matty Malaprop

I'm More Partial to Mimicking Magpies

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browser,cat,Command,computer,copy,copycat,copying,double meaning,internet,literalism,option,right click
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... but sadly in good ol' Montucky it's illegal to keep magpies as pets. And no, I'm not making that up. - Matty Malaprop

YOU'RE A MONSTER!

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computer,cookies,Cookie Monster,delete,double meaning,Hall of Fame,internet,option
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The digital age has not been kind to this poor and hungry beast. - Matty Malaprop

But She Still Uses Dial-Up, So She Can't Receive Kahlos

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browse,eye,eyebrows,Hall of Fame,homophone,internet,literalism,similar sounding,surf,unibrow
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Mindless web browsing is a pretty fine way to spend a Frida night, if you ask me. - Matty Malaprop

Wat, Indeed

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Hall of Fame,homophone,internet,lingo,lolwat,wat,watt,weird,wtf
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Color me about as confused as humanly possible re: this one. Anyone care to illuminate it for me? - Matty Malaprop