He Was Popping Without Stopping Before it Was Cool

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He Was Popping Without Stopping Before it Was Cool
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What brand of chip is this? Oh, well it's pretty obscure. You've probably never heard of it. - Matty Malaprop

Classic Newb Hipster Mistake!

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Classic Newb Hipster Mistake!
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Every veteran hipster knows you don't drink your coffee until you've chain-smoked four cigarettes, duh! - Matty Malaprop

He Wrote Mein Kampf Before it Was Cool

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He Wrote Mein Kampf Before it Was Cool
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He was also listening to Wagner when he was still underground. - Matty Malaprop

Adolf Hipster

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Adolf Hipster
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Because a man's sociopathic dogma is only as strong as his plugs are wide. - Matty Malaprop

He's in Love With a Pamphlet

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He's in Love With a Pamphlet
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It's also very probable that he was on a boat well before the Lonely Island ever were. Just sayin'. - Matty Malaprop