And by "the easy way" I of course mean the wrong way, because everyone knows tenses in French are the purest form of confounding hell and not like they are in English at all. - Matty Malaprop

I guess I'm just unlucky. Every time I buy something nice for myself, it always seems to missedeariously disappear... - Matty Malaprop

But Yoda lived in that swamp alone... do I dare think about the objects of his affection there? - Matty Malaprop

Finding stardom on the Internet is difficult. I just hope this newcomer doesn't let his first failures inflame him. - Matty Malaprop

Be keffiyeh what you wish for, tie. You just might get it. - Matty Malaprop

Granted, he might be obedient because his brain was replaced with a potato, but he's obedient regardless. - Matty Malaprop

Well at least his natural response to your command wasn't simply to bend over... - Matty Malaprop