But Make Sure To Handle With Care

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But Make Sure To Handle With Care
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Seriously, you don't know the meaning of "the brink of death" until your nose is getting nipped at by an aggravated goose. - Matty Malaprop

Learning French, the Easy Way

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Learning French, the Easy Way
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And by "the easy way" I of course mean the wrong way, because everyone knows tenses in French are the purest form of confounding hell and not like they are in English at all. - Matty Malaprop

I Always Knew Football Was a Thinking Man's Game

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I Always Knew Football Was a Thinking Man's Game
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Well at least his natural response to your command wasn't simply to bend over... - Matty Malaprop

Profoundly Punny Yoda Says:

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Profoundly Punny Yoda Says:
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But Yoda lived in that swamp alone... do I dare think about the objects of his affection there? - Matty Malaprop