It's All About the Shades

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cool,sunglasses,literalism,ranch,flavor,double meaning,cool ranch
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He's a real fly bro, but he's also a certified medical professional. So keep him around, because he can help you work on your game with the ladies, and if you ever get into a fight, he'll be there afterward to dress your wounds. - Matty Malaprop

Ugh, Some Snacks Are Just SO Judgmental!

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cracker,crackers,double meaning,flavor,judgmental,literalism,snacks,unsavory
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I'm sure you'd really like them if you just gave them a chance! I mean, who knows? They might even turn out to be quite sweet! - Matty Malaprop

Not So Much Demeaning As Merely Descriptive...

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bag,blonde,coffee,double meaning,flavor,literalism,pejorative,Starbucks
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Shame though. The man who found her tossed her out after he was done as though she was just so much trash. - Matty Malaprop