Valentine's Day was yesterday, sure, but the campiness of this joke is timeless if you ask me. - Matty Malaprop

Just be thankful it wasn't a fire escape, otherwise it would have gone out in far more of a blaze of glory! - Matty Malaprop

There's a reason they call them burritos, you know. - Matty Malaprop

Regarding your recent string of successful camping trips, I'd wager you're on a bit of a hot streak. - Matty Malaprop

And one more falls prey to the dreaded phenomenon of spontaneous cottonbustion. - Matty Malaprop

All his life he's been engulfed by the pains of discrimination. In college he tried to start a petition to implement firearm protection into his campus constitution, but alas his campaign failed to ignite any interest. - Matty Malaprop