Don't worry junior, you're not alone in this. My dad's always zombie-esque before he gets his morning coffee in him too. - Matty Malaprop

It might not be the most riveting story in the universe, but it certainly is a shoo-in for the most paternal. - Matty Malaprop

I like the way they emphasize the puns with CAPS LOCK. Oh wait. Actually, I don't like that at all. Never mind. - Matty Malaprop