Innovation is Timeless

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comparison,entrepreneur,newer,older,opposites,similar sounding,suffix
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Given the age of Facebook at this point, I wouldn't exactly call Zuckerberg an entrepreneur. Maybe an entrepremiddleaged? - Matty Malaprop

Is it Spiked With Scotch?

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comparison,dogs,fancy,literalism,mineral water,perrier,scottish terrier,side by side,similarly spelled,terrier,water
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No, seriously, is it? Because I'll totally shill out four bucks for a weak bottle of Teachers, and that sh*t ain't even good! - Matty Malaprop

French Toast

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attitude,beret,comparison,delicious,francais,france,french,french toast,literalism,superior,superiority complex,toast
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Relieves Itching, AND Angry Jurors!

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aide,comparison,cortaid,court,homophones,literalism,side by side
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Or something like that. I WORK ON THE INTERNET. How the hell should I know what a court aide does? #TooLazyToGoogle - Matty Malaprop

Don't Even Ask About Big Wayne...

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comparison,lil wayne,literalism,little,normal,rapper,size
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It's a touchy subject that's primarily communicated using various different yo' mama jokes. Unpleasant and awkward, to say the least. - Matty Malaprop

I Think We Should Just Abananadon This Conversation Altogether

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comparison,related,fruits,fruitless,oranges,apples
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What a pear these two argumentative chaps make... - Matty Malaprop

With Great Facial Hair Comes Great Responsibility

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after,before,comparison,ice,ice cube,literalism,opposites,shaved,shaved ice,unshaved
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I just hope this intrepid cube doesn't melt under all the pressure. - Matty Malaprop