Ain't Nuffin' Gonna Stop My Muffin Top

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after,before,literalism,muffin,nothing,related,similar sounding
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Clearly this joke is just shamelessly pandering to all the "30 Rock" fans out there. - Matty Malaprop

I'm Holding Out for Handlebar Potter, Personally

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after,before,double meaning,hairy,Hall of Fame,Harry Potter,homophone,literalism,shaved
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Mostly because then I'd have reason to loudly exclaim: "You're a greaser, Harry!" - Matty Malaprop

I C What You D'd There

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after,before,CD player,dont,homophone,now,see,vanished
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What? It did what it said on the label and walked away, man. You really only have yourself to blame. - Matty Malaprop

Classic Newb Hipster Mistake!

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answer,before,burn,coffee,cool,double meaning,hipster,literalism,question,sip,tongue
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Every veteran hipster knows you don't drink your coffee until you've chain-smoked four cigarettes, duh! - Matty Malaprop

The Land Before Time

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before,double meaning,Hall of Fame,land,literalism,misinterpretation,Movie,reinterpretation,series,The Land Before Time,time
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Because Less is Moore...right?

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after,more,surname,less,Michael Moore,homophone,opposite,before
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He Must Be in Prison Often Since His Voice Ain't Ever Free

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after,before,behind bars,double meaning,free,Hall of Fame,jail,literalism,Morgan Freeman,not,prison,surname
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... because his voice is lovely, and he's got a talent for narration, and thus he can charge people lots of money to do voiceover work, and so it's not free, since it costs money... - Matty Malaprop