It's Been Done to So Much Death It's Now a Zombie Pun

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It's Been Done to So Much Death It's Now a Zombie Pun
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OKAY I GET IT HIS NAME LENDS ITSELF TO VERY LITERAL INTERPRETATIONS WILL YOU PLEASE STOP NOW?? - Matty Malaprop

I Don't Think This Right is Limited to Soviet Russia...

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I Don't Think This Right is Limited to Soviet Russia...
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Ah, the ol' second amendment word order switcheroo. I didn't see that one com-OH WAIT YES I DID. - Matty Malaprop

Talk About a Buckshot

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Talk About a Buckshot
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Black bear just got burned so hard, he's going to need a winter's worth of hibernation for his creys. - Matty Malaprop

Are You Sure You Got the Poles Right?

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Are You Sure You Got the Poles Right?
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... because last I checked, I could have sworn the expulsion of excrement was a subtraction from a being... - Matty Malaprop

He's Been There for Hours and He's Just Bearly Starting to Color

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He's Been There for Hours and He's Just Bearly Starting to Color
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How many UV rays would a bare-bottomed bear soak up if a bare-bottomed bear soaked up UV rays? - Matty Malaprop