Maybe you can use these to get into your neighbor's sweet-ass El Camino? - Matty Malaprop

His name, quite unsurprisingly, is Lemmy. - Matty Malaprop

... groupies, amirite? - Matty Malaprop

Maybe you'll have better luck gaining exposure if you upload your music to the internet? - Matty Malaprop

So here's the thing. This is a möbius strip. This is a Mobius Band. DON'T GET IT TWISTED (LOL LIKE A MOBIUS STRIP IS) GUYS! - Matty Malaprop

I don't care what anyone says; I'll love Steven Seagal and his body of work until I'm Half Past Dead. - Matty Malaprop

At long last, we've discovered the reason for the breakup between Blake Sennett and Jenny Lewis! - Matty Malaprop