Pole Dancing.

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gifs,pole dancing,babes,Cats,funny
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Touché, Random Soft-Newsy Blurb

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flaccid,innuendo,p33n,recounting,running joke,security,story,TSA
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And when I say "soft-newsy," I mean WHO WRITES FIRST-NAME ONLY BYLINES LIKE THAT? - Matty Malaprop

Point Made.

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answer,coming,double meaning,literalism,pr0n,question
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Don't talk about Rule 34 don't talk about Rule 34 DON'TTALKABOUTRULE34DON'TTALKABOUTRULE34!!— - Matty Malaprop

Chain Link

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chain link,chain,link,the legend of zelda,literalism,double meaning,categoryimage
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It does its job, but please do take care to not pull on it with too much triforce, lest it snap clean in two. - Matty Malaprop

I Think Literal Oasis is More Interesting Than Figurative Oasis, TBH

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car,champagne,champagne supernova,color,double meaning,Hall of Fame,literalism,lyrics,oasis,sky,song,supernova
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Haters gonna hate but no seriously guys Oasis is really really really f*cking terrible. - Matty Malaprop

Long Way Until Effective Sea Horse Cloning

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doesnt-work-like-that,horse,ocean,swimming
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We Need Lemon-Aid Over Here!

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aid,double meaning,homophones,lemonade,lemons,morbid,visualization
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He's a fighter, I'll give him that, but the shrapnel is literally squeezing the life out of him! If we don't get him to a medic before he runs out of juice, then I fear he'll be nothing but a bloody pulp by nightfall. - Matty Malaprop