anthropomorphizing

ADDERALL I used to think Sonic's shoes made him fast...

SLICK MONKEY is mocking you.

EMO TRUCK Optimus Prime's depressed brother

DUDE She's with me!

WELL, F*

THIS OWL Wants a divorce.

BOY SCOUT PLANE Assists the elderly

PROFESSOR SHEPPARD Renders your higher education worthless

MEDIOCRE at best.

SALT SHAKERS I've been using them to hold my toothbrush for years

HUMANS We hate them.

DON'T USE FIRE it scares the trees

EMO LOG always looking at its sadness