terrible jokes

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Object-label meme where people playing cards represent "Innocent people just trying to talk" and a guy about to slap his cards down on the table represents "That's what she said"

Foolproof Conversation-Ruiner

Sign that reads, "What kind of train eats too much? A chew chew train ahahaha. Omg please call me I'm so lonely, I need friends"

Please I'm Begging You

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Tweet that reads, "I am starting a charity to teach short people maths. It's called Making the Little Things Count"

Gotta Teach 'Em Somehow

Tweet that reads, "[Funeral] Me: Do you mind if I say a word? Widow: Please do; Me: *Clears throat* Plethora! Widow: Thank you. That means a lot"

#DadJoke

Pic of a washed-up jellyfish-like creature on the beach wearing sunglasses; someone messages below "What's kraken"

Groan

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Caption that reads, "When the customer makes a stupid joke but you need the job so you give your best fake smile" above a pic of a cat with a big fake smile

"It Didn't Scan So It Must Be Free, Right?"

OP beats friend's dad at their own dad-joke game by asking if he wants some ice for an injury that was caused by dropping ice on his foot

The Dad Was Out-Dadded

Tumblr post that reads, "I tell dad jokes but I have no kids; I'm a faux pa"

Cue Intense Groaning

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Caption that reads, "Friend: You've already said that joke before; Me ..." above a pic of a toy Bart Simpson that says, "Bart has six cool sayings"

That's All Folks

Pic of a group meeting under the caption, "Sup I'm Chad, been sober for like 40 days. Not in a row or anything, just total."

It's Kind Of A New Record For Me

Tweet that reads, "You attract what you fear;" someone replies, "Omg I'm so scared of $10 billion"

I'm Scared Of Cute Little Puppies

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Text conversation that reads, "Why does the Norway navy have bar codes on the sides of their ships? So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian"

What A Knee-Slapper!

Text conversation where someone asks their friend if they've heard of Murphy's Law, then asks if they've heard of 'Cole's Law' making a joke about coleslaw

A Hearty Laugh Was Had By All

Sign that reads, "If women in Nepal prefer dogs, what can a cat man do?"

Groan

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Post that 'sums up the 90s' with an equation at the bottom adding up all of the years of the 90s, equaling 945'

Trolololol

Pic of a street corner with a sign that says the corner is available; caption reads, "Oh look, your mom quit her job"

An Oldie But A Goldie

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Carpooler demands coworkers clock out early so she can attend son's medical appointment, gets offended when they make alternative travel arrangements: 'No way our managers would let us leave 45 minutes early for someone else’s child'

Carpooler demands coworkers clock out early so she can attend son's medical appointment, gets offended when they make alternative travel arrangements: 'No way our managers would let us leave 45 minutes early for someone else’s child'

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Gym-goer takes 25-minute "everything shower" at their $130/month gym, ignores repeated knocks on the door: 'Gym showers are for getting the basics done, not spending almost 30 minutes deep conditioning your hair'

Gym-goer takes 25-minute "everything shower" at their $130/month gym, ignores repeated knocks on the door: 'Gym showers are for getting the basics done, not spending almost 30 minutes deep conditioning your hair'

Dad refuses to call an ambulance for his 25-year-old son, whose spleen ruptured, because he was at work and ambulances are expensive: 'He looked at me and asked if I could drive myself.'

Dad refuses to call an ambulance for his 25-year-old son, whose spleen ruptured, because he was at work and ambulances are expensive: 'He looked at me and asked if I could drive myself.'

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