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terrible jokes

Foolproof Conversation-Ruiner

Object-label meme where people playing cards represent "Innocent people just trying to talk" and a guy about to slap his cards down on the table represents "That's what she said"

Via UrBoiNoNo

Please I'm Begging You

Sign that reads, "What kind of train eats too much? A chew chew train ahahaha. Omg please call me I'm so lonely, I need friends"

Via jshelbs

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Gotta Teach 'Em Somehow

Tweet that reads, "I am starting a charity to teach short people maths. It's called Making the Little Things Count"

Via RatherRunWhenYouCantCrawl

#DadJoke

Tweet that reads, "[Funeral] Me: Do you mind if I say a word? Widow: Please do; Me: *Clears throat* Plethora! Widow: Thank you. That means a lot"

Via Anamesolongnoonecouldhavepossiblychosenit2

Groan

Pic of a washed-up jellyfish-like creature on the beach wearing sunglasses; someone messages below "What's kraken"

Via gajhede52

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"It Didn't Scan So It Must Be Free, Right?"

Caption that reads, "When the customer makes a stupid joke but you need the job so you give your best fake smile" above a pic of a cat with a big fake smile

Via DiamondFellInLava

The Dad Was Out-Dadded

OP beats friend's dad at their own dad-joke game by asking if he wants some ice for an injury that was caused by dropping ice on his foot

Via DalekEvo

Cue Intense Groaning

Tumblr post that reads, "I tell dad jokes but I have no kids; I'm a faux pa"

Via CodyBurkett

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That's All Folks

Caption that reads, "Friend: You've already said that joke before; Me ..." above a pic of a toy Bart Simpson that says, "Bart has six cool sayings"

Via KRaeB

It's Kind Of A New Record For Me

Pic of a group meeting under the caption, "Sup I'm Chad, been sober for like 40 days. Not in a row or anything, just total."

Via zeppzepp

I'm Scared Of Cute Little Puppies

Tweet that reads, "You attract what you fear;" someone replies, "Omg I'm so scared of $10 billion"

Via peddlerofmemes

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Har Har Har

Chart depicting gold, fool's gold and comedy gold, which is represented as "Holding the door open for a guy and saying 'Ladies first'"

Via yoshiyum

What A Knee-Slapper!

Text conversation that reads, "Why does the Norway navy have bar codes on the sides of their ships? So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian"

Via MagicalCats89

I'll Pass

An abbreviation on a box in a restaurant that reads, "41590 LOL BUTT MILK"

Via anlyin

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A Hearty Laugh Was Had By All

Text conversation where someone asks their friend if they've heard of Murphy's Law, then asks if they've heard of 'Cole's Law' making a joke about coleslaw

Via ultimateshtposter

Groan

Sign that reads, "If women in Nepal prefer dogs, what can a cat man do?"

Via VinnieASL

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Enabling parents give into their spoiled 15-year-old daughter's every wish, scold 16-year-old daughter for not doing the same: 'I told my parents I don't love my sister' 1

Man offers to pay for trip to Disney World for his girlfriend and her 12 and 9-year-old kids, rescinds offer when she insists he pay for her ex-husband and his new family to go too: 'I can afford to do a lot of things. I only do them if I want to' 2

Dad allows his 7-year-old daughter to stay up all night after she constantly resisted her 10 PM bedtime, cries from exhaustion during her after school activities: 'My wife questioned my parenting technique' 3

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