Twitter is a lot of things: a hub for political rants and raves, a sounding board for comedians, and a great way to keep up with current events and gossip. And as Twitter user @sixthformpoet displays in this classic thread, it's also a fabulous medium for storytellers who deserve their voices to be heard. This three part tale has it all: sadness, serendipitous romance, humor, and even some serious life lessons. And we're willing to bet you'll want more when you reach the end.
Story Time
Buckle up folks, this is one hell of a wild ride! Twitter user and comedian @avitable took to the social media site to regale us with a story of narrowly avoiding death at the hand of an unhinged stripper. It starts innocently enough with a Kevin Hart show, and ends with some seriously unfortunate mug shots. While we appreciate the insanity of his story, we're mostly just glad he made it out alive.
The ol' text scammer begging for gift cards to benefit some fake cause has sadly become a tale as old as time. People who are less than senile have definitely started to catch on, and some enterprising individuals even try to put the scammers in their place. This particular genius decided to flex his Photoshop skills to attempt to send this would-be scammer a message. It took the loser while to catch on.
Dear God (no pun intended), this story is a hoot if we ever saw one. When this girl didn't get invited to her friend's bachelorette party in Vegas, she made a scene until the bride decided to invite her. It doesn't stop there though: she then sent out an email with a list of very Christian-influenced "rules" for the bride and her friends, and let's just say they're quite tame for a bachelorette getaway in Sin City...
Missing R. Kelly's Trapped In The Closet but feeling guilty because he's a scumbag? Have no fear! Twitter user @TheeDreadGod (a true master of the Twitter 'story time') is here with what can almost be considered a real-life version of the R&B singer's series. This dramatic twitter thread is full of twists, turns, and a whole lot of pizza. If you enjoy what you read below, give @TheeDreadGod a follow. He's got loads more stories where this one came from.
Montreal-based writer and director Andrew Todd is officially on our hit list. He hasn't committed any serious crimes against our soul, but he has had the blessing of weeping in the arms of John Wick 3 star Keanu Reeves. We're just so jealous that he's been touched by the living, breathing, and villain-slaying meme. Todd hopped on Twitter to share this heartwarming and nerdy tale, and now we're here to share it with you.
Sometimes fully grown adults can really amaze us with their stupid levels of pettiness. Like, seriously, this is some middle school-level grade-A pettiness right here. In this particular "case" (if you can even call it that), Lawrence Police in Kansas responded to two adult children having the world's pettiest standoff in a private parking lot. Enjoy!
