Step-parents have a difficult job to do . They have to strike a balance between being supportive of the kids and keeping their distance. Every relationship is different, of course, but it's usually better to meet the kid where they're at instead of forcing a certain dynamic onto them. This is especially true when their biological parent is deceased. Any gesture that makes it seem like you're trying to ‘replace’ them will not be met well, and you'll probably lose them forever. This is true when…