saying

Spoken on Wednesday in Ohio to a woman talking about being on welfare.

(Paul Ryan)

If you can't beat 'em, Santor 'em

(Rick Santorum)

And in truth, I probably could not have written a concise, punny post title for this particular image, so I'm still a liar even in my attempt to act truthfully. Well shoot. - Matty Malaprop

Ides of March. Eyes of Marge. Potato toaster strudel. - Matty Malaprop

If you're going to pun homophonically, then for the love of god you could at least use actual homophones! - Matty Malaprop

Seriously dude, if you can just let go of your popsicle angst, then I'm pretty sure your hostile exterior will simply melt away. - Matty Malaprop

Well then... screw you, tiny, child-sized bladder! No longer shall I answer to your whiny protestations! - Matty Malaprop