Ah yes, the summer. As a child I looked forward to this. Freedom from school. Warm weather. Maybe going to the beach. Languishing in my incredibly hot house eating fake popsicles made of juice as my mom somehow drank hot tea and chain smoked in the kitchen. The best times were visiting my grandparents and getting to watch cable television. Nowadays, summer is slightly less boring, but mostly because we have to exist as semi-functioning members of society as the season gets continuously unbearab…