review

Advertisement
Advertisement
americana-this-shirt-will-change-your-life
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
"I wasn't ready for this shirt.

I bought it for a 4th of July party, thinking it would be a fun gag shirt. Little did I know. I pulled it out of the box and immediately sank to my knees and wept tears of pure joy, and by "pure joy" I mean "pure Jack Daniel's". I strapped it on and my bench press increased by a 100lbs. I whipped the whisky from my face, looked in the mirror, and in my reflection I saw him behind me.

George Washington. Looking stern and powerful. He nodded once, an affirmation. I knew what I had to do.

I flung myself from the bathroom window and this shirt literally turned me into a bald eagle. I flew over Iraq and pooped tomahawk missiles on ISIS positions, then I flew back home and turned into a 1967 Pontiac GTO and drove all night until I arrived at P****town. Population: Me.
Advertisement
patriotism tank top review poorly dressed g rated - 8377131008
  • -
  • Vote
  • -

"I wasn't ready for this shirt.
I bought it for a 4th of July party, thinking it would be a fun gag shirt. Little did I know. I pulled it out of the box and immediately sank to my knees and wept tears of pure joy, and by "pure joy" I mean "pure Jack Daniel's". I strapped it on and my bench press increased by a 100lbs. [sic] I whipped [sic] the whisky from my face, looked in the mirror, and in my reflection I saw him behind me.
George Washington. Looking stern and powerful. He nodded once, an affirmation. I knew what I had to do.
I flung myself from the bathroom window and this shirt literally turned me into a bald eagle. I flew over Iraq and pooped tomahawk missiles on ISIS positions, then I flew back home and turned into a 1967 Pontiac GTO and drove all night until I arrived at P**town. Population: Me.

Advertisement
Favorite

Sugarless Haribo Gummy Bear Reviews Tell Tales of Toilet Terror

Nothing seems more innocent and pleasing than a bag of gem-like gummy bears. 

Well don't be fooled by these rainbow colored rectum wreckers. Heed the warnings of these hilarious online reviews and keep your bowels intact.

Read more about Haribo Sugarless Gummy Bears on Know Your Meme

Bag of Haribo Sugarless Gummy Bears - Cover for list of Amazon reviews.
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Advertisement