It's Twitter time

Twitter is officially one year away from being a legal adult. I have been on the bird app (or, in the pre-iPhone days, the bird website ) for over half of its existence, so you'd think I would have a strong opinion about Twitter being around for 17 years. At this point, I'm just glad that Twitter is still managing to function. Elon Musk's purchase of the company appears to be the beginning of the end. The website is not getting any better, and Musk's plans to drive new users to the site seem to…

They're free!

I wish I could be one of those people who could raw dog vision. By that, I mean the second you open your eyes, you can see the world without assistance from glasses or contacts . If you're a diva of the 20/20 vision experience, consider me officially jealous of you. I've worn contacts for 10 years now, and sometimes I have the creeping inner thought that I should just go and get my eyes zapped. The fact that there are lasers that can easily make your vision good in one foul swoop is so insanely…

We've got a fresh hot list of memes for one Mr. Randy Om? Is there a Rand Om in the room? Randolph Om, are you present? Thank you, I'll be here all week. Coming up with clever and funny pun names is one of the few instances where I find the art of punning vaguely tolerable. My friends and I keep a list of different pun names we think of. They range from incredible to abominable: Collin Response, Jaqueline Turn, Miss Taken Identity, Patty O'Furniture, Heather Interior, and Cathy Lick. The list g…

No offense

Fooled ya!

If you're looking for the absolute best memes to exist in the history of the internet, you have come to the wrong website. That said, if you're looking for a quick and painless bit of distraction, perhaps you have come to the right place. When boredom strikes my body, I know that I'll accept form of entertainment. While some of my favorite boredom-busting activities are, um, more PG than others, looking at memes is a pretty good place to start when you've run out of batteries. I mean, energy. Y…

Girl, put your random on!

It recently came to my attention that if I was left to my own devices, I might end up rotting in my bedroom and never leaving my apartment. That's because it's so easy to waste my own time scrolling through Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook. I t's not the most healthy situation. See, I end up putting off important things like laundry or showering, all because I get sucked into the social media hole. I end up cobbling together terrible outfits from whatever is clean, and having to take a little “…

Most memes are not that memorable. They slip in and out of your mind as quickly as what you ate for lunch yesterday. They're unsustainable, and that's the way they were built. We are not supposed to sit around looking at one meme all day, expecting to be satisfied with just that. Absolutely not! We can only sustain ourselves with a regular flow of memes in our minds, with only a few really sticking with us. One of the few I still remember the meme from 10 years ago was The Marvelous Breadfish.…

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That's MY Best Picture winner!

Hiding in the bathroom when you don't want to be somewhere is a time-honored tradition. I've done it my whole life; I'm not afraid to smell a little dookie to get me out of math class for five minutes. That is a price I'm willing to pay. Hiding in the bathroom improved in high school because that's when vapes got popular. Instead of the bathroom smelling like a bathroom, it was filled with an array of tropical fruit flavors . The teen vapers made my bathroom experience much brighter than any Fe…

These are cool, we promise

Twitter never sleeps