quit your bullshit

The internet is brimming with examples of bullshitters who state opinion as fact, make unwarranted declarations about their authority on a subject, and make up ridiculous rules about who has the right to enjoy or experience specific things. These people are called gatekeepers. The annoying gatekeeper is also known for putting others down for not suffering enough to warrant feeling unhappy with a shitty situation. Like if you're venting to someone about being exhausted after a 40-hour work week and they just mock you for not having worked 70 hours like them. r/gatekeeping is a good document of people who won't get off their high horse, even after someone points out that their horse is just a withered cardboard box. 

We've got a bunch of cringey and eye-roll inducing examples of groundless gatekeeping thanks to all the avid screenshotters out there. 

If you go literally anywhere on the internet, you're guaranteed to come across bullshit, fake news, and straight up liars. Some very online people just can't help themselves and lie about the weirdest stuff. Why do they do it? Does it give them satisfaction to get away with lying to  strangers on the internet? Or are they just trying to get the world record for Reddit upvotes? Whatever it is, it's pretty gratifying to see liars get publicly called out in forums like r/quityourbullshit. We've got some pretty cringey and amusing examples of times deceivers got what they deserved. 

During more "normal times" we relish seeing restaurant owners call out unreasonable customers for bullshit reviews. Now, while restaurant workers and bartenders are risking their lives to cater to entitled people, we find that we relish the takedowns even more. Today we come to you with a classic Karen tale from Hucknall in the UK. This Karen, whose real name is Jo, took to Facebook to express her dismay at being kicked out of a restaurant after spending  £700 on a birthday celebration at the venue. 

The restaurant quickly responds - correcting her lies (the party spent about a quarter of that) and calling her group out for their drunken and entitled behavior. It's an expert takedown that requires only facts to make the Karen (and her entire family) seem out of line. And we think you'll find it pretty entertaining.

I remember back in the summer of 1995, I decided to be super spontaneous and hop on a one-way train from Montreal to Seattle so that I could finally see my favorite band in the world—Nirvana. I was only 12 years old, but everyone always thought I was much older due to my exceptionally high IQ score of 200, so I wasn't too worried. The two-week journey was grueling, but luckily I managed to win a hefty chunk of change along the way after beating two large Russian men at several rounds of poker (those Canadian trains can get pretty wild). When I finally got to the venue entrance just as the opening band (who happened to be Radiohead) began playing, the door guy narrowed his eyes at me and asked 'wait just a minute there, where's your ticket and ID?' I took the wad of poker winnings from my pocket and slammed it on the table. 'Sold out' the door guy said, smirking at me smugly. I totally was heartbroken. I racked my genius brain for a solution, but nothing came. Just when I was about to give up, someone tapped me on the shoulder from behind. I turned around and almost screamed at the sight of Kurt Cobain himself, standing there like a guardian angel. In one swift move, he grabbed the cash, handed it back to me, and gestured for me to follow him through the entrance. On our way through he looked at the door guy and said 'you're fired, dude.' I got to watch Nirvana from the VIP area and then I spent the rest of the night hanging out with the whole band backstage and they laughed at all my jokes. It was the best night of my life.

There are three kinds of liars on the internet. Those who spread fake news, con-artists who try to scam others, and those who make up laughably fake stories for no good reason. It's relatively easy to lie online, especially with the whole internet and its wealth of resources at your disposal. But some people are very, very bad at bullsh*tting. In the age of 'reverse image search', that stolen image some redditor is trying to pawn off as their own is just one click away from being exposed by internet detectives. And these days it's just as easy to google something as it is to lie, so if you're going to post a lengthy tall tale about your non-existent memories of hanging out with Nirvana, perhaps you should fact-check your own lies first. That way, at the very least it might be an entertaining story.

We've got some amusing and pretty satisfying instances of liars getting called out for their BS on the internet. But it really makes you think—Seeing as we pulled these screenshots from the internet, who's to say that the lies aren't also lies? Anyone could photoshop a fake callout of a fake lie someone told and post it to r/QuitYourBullshit for karma. What if we're all just caught in an inception of internet lies? What if we're actually in the matrix and I'm not even typing this right now? Anyway...here's some content.

Sometimes it's reassuring just to know that the entitled Karens out there do often times get called out for their BS. All we have to say is, thank God for subreddits like /r/QuitYourBullshit where we get to scroll through the actual evidence for a good helping of schadenfreude!

Too many people seem to assume that lying on the internet from behind the comfort of a keyboard somehow protects them from getting caught spreading BS. On the contrary, it only takes a few clicks to debunk some sus information, and thanks to reverse image search, it's pretty hard to get away with taking credit for an image just for the upvotes. Egregious liars are extremely cringe, but there is a silver lining—we get to experience the satisfaction of watching these dumbasses get called out. We've collected some brutal screenshots exposing internet liars and their brazen BS. 

There's something about the anonymity of the internet that allows people to feel completely comfortable lying to other people. Sometimes they lie as a scare tactic, for example, providing bullshit anecdotes to scare people away from vaccines. Some people lie to mine Reddit karma. And then there are the weirdos who simply want attention. Unfortunately for these bullshitters, there are tons of internet users who are just waiting to call them out for their deceptive stories. And we love to see it. 

People like to talk real big on the internet but fortunately for us, sometimes these people get completely shut down and called out on their bullsh*t. And we're thankful for that because it's so satisfying to see it happen - even if it's not in real life. If people aren't at least trying to lie properly, they deserve for us to laugh at them.

Some people just need to be put in their place when they tell straight-up lies on the internet. We would recommend just not trying to bullshit your way through life in order to solve this problem, but it gives us so much schadenfreude-y entertainment that we're not going to do that. 

Check out /r/QuitYourBullshit and Fail Blog for even more stupidity!

There are a lot of memes about the shameless (and arguably pitiful) people who attempt to ensnare everyone they know in their insidious multi-level marketing schemes. Hell, we all have that friend from high school who is trying to sell us nail wraps or ugly leggings. It's annoying as hell. So it's very satisfying to see this wannabe "entrepreneur" get school regarding her own game. 

The thing about being online is that you can be whoever you want to be and say anything your cute little imagination conjures up. However, there are consequences to blatantly lying, like getting publicly called out by people who do a bit of research, or ending up on subreddit like r/thathappened. Sometimes the highly sus anecdotes that people spew all over social media are not totally implausible, but they still have that air of cringiness about them that just screams 'fake.' We've got a bunch of examples of absurd stories that may or may not be total bullsh*t. 

Unless you were born yesterday, most of us can agree that the easiest place to lie is the internet. These aspiring deceivers did a really, really, bad job at pulling the wool over the internet's eyes - and got called out for it. Seeing these losers brought to justice made our day, and we hope it makes yours.

Hey, we get it...we all like to embellish the truth from time to time to make our stories a little more interesting. But the trouble starts when the lie wasn't even believable in the first place or someone can easily fact-check your story. The following people clearly didn't think things through very well!

Nobody is safe from the Sherlocks and superheroes of the internet - not even Sarah Silverman! 

Some people will never learn - play with the internet and you WILL get burned.