Om nom nom

It's true that everyone needs to eat to survive. But, as many have noted before us, there are people who eat to live, and then there are the people who live to eat. People like me. In recent years it seems as though a third kind of person has popped up: someone who eats - or cooks - to watch the world burn. You see, these sorts of people are the ones making cringey food , well, a thing. Before the age of TikTok or Reddit, crimes against food were largely private. Now they're everywhere, being m…

It's eating time

Crimes against pizzakind

Children have incredibly creative minds and use this creativity in numerous ways. At my elementary school, the innocents used their childlike wonder to create the grossest monstrosity of food ever concocted. This activity was usually limited to kids who bought lunch at the cafeteria. It's much more complicated to play with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and carrot sticks than it is to mix school milk with a fruit cocktail. Chicken strip day was always the grossest. People would pour strawbe…

Do y'all remember when the concept of bacon was the biggest meme in the world? 2012 was truly a time to be alive: A time when memes were so simple that a popular food could dominate the landscape of popular memes for over a year. Now don't get me wrong, I like bacon. It's the only meat that I would miss if I followed the dietary restrictions put forth by the Old Testament. That being said, even as a meme-obsessed teen, I found the bacon thing to be a bit much. The bacon meme extended far beyond…

We all need comfort every once and a while . We can't just walk around like husks of human beings with our emotional support needs staying completely unmet. That's not realistic. Usually, we defer to our friends, families, and lovers for comforting us in times of need. But that can be a little difficult and vulnerable to ask for. When nervous about burdening others with my emotional needs, I tend to turn towards movies, TV shows, ASMR-tists, and memes to help me get out of dark times. If I'm in…

Papa John would be proud

Happy Tuesday, y'all. I don't know about you, but I'm nowhere near recovered from the festivities, gluttony, and all-around insanity that occurred between Christmas and New Year's Day . Despite having yesterday off, I still feel as bloated as I did the day before. Let's just say it's not a good week for trying to fit into jeans, but it's an even worse week for trying to focus. Fortunately, this job involves some duties that don't require much in the way of agonized toiling, and collecting the w…

Also, dead celebrity pranks, Australian garage parties, and chain restaurant brawls? All in for 2023!

If fast food is so bad for you, then why does it feel so good? Popeyes and Raising Canes are definitely guilty pleasures of mine, but they really shouldn't be! After all, any kind of unhealthy food is fine in moderation. People freaking out about the dangers of fast food makes me think about the damage the movie Supersize Me did to our collective critical thinking skills. Morgan Spurlock (yes, I know his name) really thought it was a hot take that eating at McDonalds every day for a month would…

In bad taste

Just no

Gross

No generation can mock us because we have accepted the cringe—NOW, WE ARE UNSTOPPABLE!

Fast food brands love to pat themselves on the back for their so-called innovations. And most of the time, the self-congratulations are completely unwarranted. We're talking KFC's ‘Double Down,’ Taco Bell's misguided foray into the chicken world, and Panera's grilled mac and cheese sandwich. Yesterday, the world got a taste of another unnecessary menu item that will probably be discontinued before the year is through: The Papa John's Papa Bowl.