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By Smirre
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It sounds like this poor bird really egrets ever leaving you. I guess it just goes to show that love is always fight or flight. - Matty Malaprop

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So it attracts mutts to men like Axe attracts obscene amounts of money to miserable advertisements? - Matty Malaprop

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By spartie
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Do you think he might be on the prowl for the elusive Firefox? I bet he wants to mount its taxidermied head to the wall of his Opera. - Matty Malaprop

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By MeGustaDragons
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No offense Mrs. Dragon, but when my partner grows sweeter mutton chops than I do, I tend to get a little turned off... - Matty Malaprop

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By xyzpdq1
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Michael Jackson: Bringing out the perverted 12-year-old inside each and every one of us. OH WAIT. - Matty Malaprop

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By Unknown
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99.9 percent effective at stopping unexpected pregnancy. 100 percent effective at causing unexpected fall fails. - Matty Malaprop

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... is his position on your bookshelf relative to the REAL king of The Road. - Matty Malaprop

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