last week tonight

Presenting the FIFA Challenge, featuring Bud Light Lime, Adidas, and McDonald's.

On Thursday, a 5-person FCC commission voted 3-2 to reclassify broadband internet as a public utility, much like water or electricity. This bars internet service providers from splitting the internet into "lanes," where customers' internet speeds would be based upon how much they were able to pay.

Now that the internet is a public utility, it is immune from such regulation in the same way that you don't have to pay for a "Premium Tap Water Package" where you only get a certain number of gallons of tap water to use per month. That's fantastic news, because let's face it, no one wants to live in '1984.'

"Did you know police can just take your stuff if they suspect it's involved in a crime? They can! It's a shady process called 'civil asset forfeiture,' and it would make for a weird episode of Law and Order."