He doesn't deserve this

It's that time of the year when every school has a million events. One day you're chaperoning a field trip for one kid, and the next day you're attending a choir concert for the other. As a kid, I loved the end of the school year for precisely this reason. I loved being busy! In hindsight, I can only imagine how stressful May was for my parents. Field Day was the best day of my young life, but it likely wasn't my mom's favorite day by any means. Not to mention, kids are so wound up by the beaut…

Babysitting kids can go two very different ways. Either the kids are totally cool, or they are absolute monsters that cannot be tamed. I was lucky that the kids I looked after were rad as hell when I was a teenage babysitter. Their parents were never too controlling, telling me that we could only do boring educational activities with the kids. I had the distinct pleasure of babysitting kids who were not toddlers, which definitely made my experience more enjoyable. Unfortunately, not everybody i…

How dare she?

I'm addicted to you (car seats) don't you know that you're toxic?

There is no group of people more unfairly scrutinized online than parents. Okay, maybe that's not 100% true, but I am baffled by the comments on nearly every parenting video I see on reels and TikTok. No matter what a parent does, no matter how normal their video is, some weirdos in the comments will pick apart and criticize them for no reason. I know this isn't wholly a problem of the internet. People have been giving parents unsolicited advice since man developed the ability to speak. The iss…

One of the most challenging parts of being a parent is the lack of sleep . Kids wear you down to the point of exhaustion and keep you up at night worrying about them. It's an incredibly unfair catch-22 of the human experience. My poor mother has been unable to sleep since I was born, and I wish I hadn't done that to her. I'm a sprite 23-year-old baby, so naturally, I've never had any problem with sleeping. I just know that if and when I pop a child out of my body, I'm going to stay up all night…

Flying with kids is so nerve-wracking. The most stressful part is gauging whether your kids will cry or have tantrums inside an enclosed metal tube for three hours. The second biggest challenge is keeping them occupied, which is much easier nowadays with tablets and iPads. A tertiary concern might be that your kids could make a mess on the plane. Luckily, if they don't throw up or have an accident, most messes are easy to pick up! At least, so we think. Semi-famous people are obsessed with twee…

Kids these days

It's difficult to keep the magic of the Easter Bunny alive for your kids. Santa is relatively easy because you can meet a man at a shopping mall that will convincingly portray him. The Tooth Fairy is simple: your kid never sees her unless you mess up or they're a super light sleeper. The Easter Bunny is a hard sell because it's unclear what form he takes. Is he a normal rabbit? Is he one of those scary bunnies in fursuits? Is he a horrifying anthropomorphic half-man, half-rabbit that will haunt…

Teachers get a lot of blame for kids' bad behavior. Parents go to parent-teacher conferences and belligerently demand that the teacher explain why their child is not doing well in class. Teachers are expected to kindly explain to parents what the issue is, even when the parents are being rude and demanding. The truth is, it's usually not the teacher's fault that a kid is failing to thrive in the classroom, and yet they have to shoulder so much of the blame. It's demonstrably unfair. In a perfec…

In California, rent would be $2500/month in this place

When will summer come?

Goes from rated R to G so fast

The golden age of parents on Twitter lying about the esoteric things their young children say has long passed us. Back in the ancient years of 2016 and 2017, parents were obsessed with tweeting things like, "My 3-year-old son came just up to me and said 'Papa, I have a childlike solution to great economic and social problems that will go viral instantly through the retweets of easily fooled rubes.'" Unfortunately for these parents, a lot of Twitter users have caught on to these unbelievably cor…

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