Your knees make a snap, crackle, pop sound more than Rice Krispies.

Every morning I wake up to my iPhone's alarm and proceed to do all my silly little tasks until 9 pm when the cycle starts over again. When I was a kid, I had no idea how much of my day would be filled with annoying responsibilities. Feeding the cat is one thing, but I never thought I'd spend so much of my precious time wiping down surfaces. Whoever made those damn wipes was a genius. A genius, who unlike me, is probably free from the shackles of a 2-hour commute. Or, you know, dead. Anyway. The…

We get it.