Growing up in Brooklyn we did a lot of walking . That walking happened on tree-lined streets and along garden-filled blocks. Some homes just had planters of petunias and left it at that. Others manicured their tiny lawns, adding tiny Japanese maples within their gates, and prickling rose bushes that (if we were lucky) would bloom twice or even thrice a year. My mom would quiz us on plant names, and if we were lucky, we'd catch glimpses of exotic plants inside peoples solariums, or make a stop a…

Plant people are everywhere these days - especially the kind of people who revel in making their indoor spaces lush with green (or purple) plants both large and small. Some of my own friends have rooms so filled with vegetation that I come home with a couple sprigs of lord knows what in my hair or on my clothing. It seems like they need a bigger room to accommodate their green friends - or perhaps a whole ass greenhouse. Judging by the plant memes we've been seeing all over the internet, this c…

A massive amount of guilt is settling into my body as I write these words. It's true. I haven't watered my aloe in a very, very long time. And I don't think it's been getting much sun. I can see it now: crispy, crunchy, parched and depressed . This is why I'm not allowed to have nice things. Specifically plants. My apartment will never be one of those plant-filled havens we see so often on Instagram. I'll never be able to take care of a fiddle leaf fig or take selfies with shelves of carefully…

It's time to BeReal. Caring for p lants makes for a pretty good coping mechanism. Sure, it's gratifying to keep a thing, anything alive, but there are selfish reasons for flexing our green thumbs, too. After a couple rough years of social distancing and spending most of our time at home, many of us likely developed new hobbies (read: addictions) while twiddling our thumbs at home. For some people, that hobby was baking one million loaves of bread and gaining 10 pandemic pounds. For many of us,…

As I write these words, a tremendous amount of shame is filling my body. You see, my aloe hasn't been watered in a very long time. Furthermore, I doubt that it has received much sunlight. It's on top of my dresser, hidden from the sun's rays because my cat thinks aloe is a delicious snack. This poor crispy, crunchy, parched plant was a gift from another Memebase editor, and I'm really not doing it justice. This is why I can't have nice things - plants in particular. Never will my apartment be o…

We suffered through the TikTok sound effects and transitions to give you the gardening hacks straight up.

Plant people are a special breed. It's true that I admire their ability to nurture and care for a living thing that doesn't wail, meow, or bark when hungry. But I have a bit of resentment toward them, too. It often seems like their money-spending habits (when it comes to their hobby) aren't publicly chided enough. Why is it irresponsible for me to spend all my “extra” money on food and clothes, but honorable for them to spend that same dough every weekend at the plant store? I call foul. As muc…

Return to wilderness

“I mean he was done really fast so he must know something I don’t.”

You don't need a lot of money to grow your own food at home or even at your tiny apartment—and these TikTokers are showing you how.

People. They suck. They suck a lot. You know what doesn't? Plants. They beautify your home and garden. They reduce stress levels. And if you want to fill your office with plants, tell your boss that they actually boost productivity and improve one's overall work outlook. We could go on and on about the studied benefits of keeping plants, but many of you are already aware of them. And we're not trying to proselytize to people who can't be bothered with botany. We're here to entertain the people…

They don't talk back.

For black, thumbs, too.

Plants are pretty cool

Plants make good coping mechanisms, I mean companions