I hate you, you hate me

Last weekend at the Grammy Awards , two things happened. Beyoncé set a record for winning the most Grammys of any artist at 29 Grammys. She also lost the Album of the Year award to Harry's House . Bey Hive members were understandably upset by this loss. After all, Beyonce has never won the coveted award, even after years of unparalleled triumphs at the Grammys. Some Grammy voters have said they didn't want to vote for Adele or Beyoncé because they've won enough already, which I find ridiculous.…

I discovered sarcasm at an early age. I vividly recall discussing the definition of the word with a fellow second grader, and we determined that sarcasm was “saying something nice in a mean way.” We were pretty on the money, but Merriam-Webster describes it as follows: Sarcasm refers to the use of words that mean the opposite of what you really want to say, especially in order to insult someone, or to show irritation, or just to be funny. Not everybody gets sarcasm. When you have a Saharan dese…

Like many internet addicts, I am unsatisfied by merely one genre of memes. Offline people love to talk about how cat memes are the only good thing that's ever happened to the internet. I agree that cat memes are a remarkable phenomenon that brings joy to millions of people every day. However, I'm skeptical that cat memes are the be-all end-all of meme culture. Any topic can be memeified, and every topic is memeified! Remember those Rules of the Internet ? It's wild that it doesn't include a "Ru…

This is style?

Parents love to document every milestone their kid reaches. A child's first steps, first word, and first day of school are all recorded carefully by their mom and dad so they can relive that memory for years to come. However, the most memorable moments of a kid's life usually happen when the cameras aren't around. When I was a kid, I wore my parents down so much one night by asking them endless questions about the biology of conjoined twins. Obviously, they didn't have extensive knowledge of th…

Youth does not last forever, and for many people, that is unforgivable. This week, Twitter user @thenorthmens went viral after posting two pictures of Leonardo DiCaprio: one in the 90s and one now, with the caption, “twink death is a terrifying thing.” If you didn't know, a twink is a slim, young, and hairless gay man. You might think, “but Leonardo DiCaprio does not fit into that category at any age!” You would be correct, but that matters very little to Twitter users. Twitter users will call…

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Do any minorities in the wizarding world have normal names?

Inquiring minds would like to know, how has your 2023 been thus far? It's wild to think that we have arrived in February, but I think many of us hope these first three months of the year pass as quickly as possible. After all, it's hard to live your best life when it is 10 degrees Fahrenheit outside on a Friday night. Luckily for me, I am obsessed with this time of the year. I feel like it is much easier for me to change my bad habits during January and February than it is to do so in the summe…

People who don't go to standup shows think that standup comedy is an incredibly cool art form. These fools believe that only the most hilarious and intelligent people can do standup, and anybody who does it must be a comedic genius. Luckily for them, they are 100% incorrect! Standup comedy shows are breeding grounds for humiliation and failure. Most of the people who do standup are not very good at it. If you ever want a surefire way to feel good about yourself, go to an open mic in a midsized…

He's the people's princess

What did he expect

Why are so many young people suddenly talking like weird therapists? There have been countless memes throughout the past couple of years about how strange and unnatural “therapy talk” is transforming the way we talk to our friends. It seemed to all start with the mass misusing of the term “emotional labor." Originally, this phrase referred to the labor customer service workers had to do to present a persistently happy

Isn't it wild that so many popular ideas about parenting came from one dude? I'm talking, of course, about Dr. Spock. No, no Dr. Spock from Star Trek, but the Dr. Spock who wrote the most influential book about parenting of the 20th century. The Common Sense Book of Baby and Child Care revolutionized child care in the 1940s and 1950s and taught parents to see their children as individuals, all with their own individual needs. Before Spock, parenting books told parents to do everything on a rigi…

Is he done for real this time?