It's time for us to face the facts: we give moms a lot of slack in this series. There are a lot of cringe mothers out in the world who detox their children from heavy metals and squirt breastmilk in their eyes when they get a stye. Even though they have some wacky ideas, they're not complete monsters. They're just women who've been sucked into a weird online subculture . It's easy to criticize mothers for a myriad of reasons. It's far too natural for us to fall into misogynistic thought pattern…

F*ck off

Instead of mooching, she could just play Meerca Chase for hours on end to make 1B Neopoints just like the rest of us did

Millennials are killing the normal name industry, or at least so it seems. The weird names young parents give their kids have become bonafide memes at this point. I don't know if we'll ever get to a point where McKinsleigh will be considered a normal name by the majority of the population. At the same time, we felt the same way about the name Britney, and nobody bats an eye at that anymore. My favorite millennial naming convention is giving your baby an old lady's name. I know two babies named…

Teaching your kids how to drive is no easy task. I gave my parents my fair share of scares when I was driving around with a learner's permit , or "temps," as some regions call it. My mom could drive with me in the high school football stadium parking lot, but that was about it. Beyond that, it was my dad's job to tell me when I was not in the lane, which was the problem 90% of the time when I was learning to drive. I was 15 years old and addicted to veering out of the lane. There are a lot of s…

Family secrets are hit or miss. You can either discover something super rad about the people you see during Christmas and Thanksgiving or realize that they really are horrible people deep down. When you're a kid, every piece of new information you learn about your extended family feels like a long-hidden family secret. Even if this is not true by definition, I believe that anything once unknown to you that you learn about your family counts as a family secret. My grandma worked for a TV station…

If you've ever scrolled through subreddits like r/AmITheAsshole, you might have noticed that there are way too many examples of spouses choosing their controlling parents ' needs over their partner's . But once in a while you come across a refreshing instance of someone standing by their significant other, even in the face of an entitled in-law from hell. When u/dadof2throwWay 's mother decided to throw away his pregnant wife's rotisserie chicken (that she'd been craving for days), he wasn't ab…

I can't imagine how difficult it must be to date as a blind person . I'm sure every hack has a hot take about who would date a blind person, and they're all pretty insulting. "This guy is so ugly; he could only pull a blind chick!" "Good thing he can't see her because if he could, he'd be in for a rude awakening." News flash: blind people are not clueless about the nuances of attractiveness just because they do not experience sight the same way sighted people do. Blindness does not make people…

How's that new kitchen looking mom?

When I was a kid, I had to take a bath or a shower every day, a tradition I've continued throughout my life. When you're a kid, you get dirty quickly and must be washed often. As I scroll through parenting TikTok , I get increasingly disgusted with the hot takes about hygiene. The number of moms I've seen online talking about only showering their kids once or twice a month baffles me. Anyone who thinks having their kid run around all stinky is healthy for them is a fool. Some parents don't bath…

What dish am I bringing this year? BEEF!

Gobble gobble family squabble

It's common knowledge that one of the basic tenants of Christmas is giving. In particular, giving to those who are less fortunate than yourself. If I had to propose a runner-up in the Most Important Christmas Values Contest TM , I would nominate “keeping the magic of Christmas alive for the children of the world."

“We could make some serious money if we had a reality TV show about this.”