donald trump

Here's the latest in "American news is f*cking crazy!" InTouch just released the entirety of their 2011 exclusive with Stormy Daniels, the porn star who allegedly had an affair with Donald Trump - and the actress dishes some seriously funny details. The dirt that Twitter fans are appreciating the most is the president's fear and hatred of sharks:

"You could see the television from the little dining room table and he was watching Shark Week and he was watching a special about the U.S.S. something and it sank and it was like the worst shark attack in history. He is obsessed with sharks. Terrified of sharks. He was like, "I donate to all these charities and I would never donate to any charity that helps sharks. I hope all the sharks die." He was like riveted. He was like obsessed. It's so strange, I know."

Strange is right. Jokesters on Twitter are definitely taking advantage of the bizarre phobia and meme-ing the news to oblivion. And for those of you who doubt the info - it's polygraph certified.

The White House's physician Dr. Ronny Jackson announced yesterday that President Trump weighs in at a healthy 239 lbs - but Guardians of the Galaxy director James Gunn isn't buying it. The Marvel director has offered $100,000 to Donald's charity of choice if he's willing to publicly step on an "accurate scale" accompanied by an impartial physician. That's a lot of guap. 

Gunn is far from alone in this cleverly named movement  The hashtag, a reference to Trump's obsession with Obama's birth, is quickly gaining traction on Twitter. Many users are joining Gunn and the girther squad in this crusade to discover the President's "true" weight - and why his height seems to keep changing. Do you think the president weights 239 pounds? Hopefully he will respond to Gunn and we will find out.

The President of the United States is the subject of much criticism after making racist remarks at a DACA meeting yesterday. Donald Trump took to Twitter early in the morning to deny the accusations, but just hours later at a press conference Illinois Senator Dick Durbin expressed surprise at the President's denial - and confirmed everything the media has been reporting. 

"When the question was raised about Haitians, for example, we have a group that have temporary protected status in the United States because they were the victims of crises and disasters and political upheaval. The largest group is El Salvadoran. The second is Honduran and the third is Haitian, and when I mentioned that fact to him, he said 'Haitians? Do we need more Haitians?' And then he went on and started to describe the immigration from Africa that was being protected in this bipartisan measure. That's where he used these vile and vulgar comments, calling the nations they come from "sh*tholes" -- the exact word used by the president not just once, but repeatedly."

Pretty damning. The hateful words have been met with shock and criticism, with CNN's Don Lemon going as far as to introduce the news by saying that the President is racist. Even the Merriam-Webster dictionary had something to say. Their twitter account announced today that "reprehensible" is the word of the day, a little solidarity with Republican Representative Ileana Little, who condemned the derogatory remarks, saying "the statements of the president are reprehensible, they're racist, they're totally incorrect." 

The internet is overflowing with memes and jokes after President Trump referred to himself as a "stable genius" on Twitter yesterday. The remark was part of a thread meant to defend his mental stability in the wake of the drama surrounding Fire and Fury, Michael Wolff's critical look at the Trump presidency. Responses ranged from fact-checking in nature, to... well, a predictable abundance of horse jokes. Even stars such as Mindy Kaling and former White House staffer Kal Penn had to get in on the fun.

Trump White House tell-all Fire and Fury has been getting an insane amount of attention after the release of several excerpts. The book, written by Michael Wolff, is an explosive look at the first nine months of what has already been a controversial presidency. An excerpt from New York Magazine has been getting the most attention - claiming that Donald Trump never really wanted to be president, and that his campaign didn't even believe he should be president. 

The book has since come under major fire from the current administration, so much that legal representation for the president has sent a cease and desist letter to both Wolff and the book's publisher. It doesn't look like the book's release will be delayed, but the controversy has been serious enough to inspire a very clever parody. A parody so good that many people have seriously fallen for it. 

Twitter user @pixelatedboat posted a riotously funny fake excerpt from the book that claims Donald Trump watches a staff-edited television channel that shows gorilla-related content 24/7. So many people have fallen for the jest that @pixelatedboat changed their name to "the gorilla channel is a joke" out of sheer desperation. Even Vice News has gotten in on the action by creating their own Gorilla Channel live feed. Notable believers in the ridiculous tweet include liberal author Eric Garland, Democratic Coalition co-founder Scott Dworkin, NYT columnist Farhad Manjoo, and author Shadi Hamid.  We've included the tweet, and the subsequent antics, below.