While most products come in various sizes, some things are just meant to be consumed in bulk: Netflix shows, Costco's entire inventory, and Cheese Balls . I have never seen Cheese Balls in a compact container in my life. Every Cheese Ball in the world is in an absurdly large package that I cannot conceptualize being practical for anyone. How long does it take a family to eat one industrial-sized box of Cheese Balls? I can't imagine they could finish it in less than two months. Maybe that's by d…

The ability to create an ambiance is an essential skill at this point. When everything seems to be falling apart around you, it's necessary to be at least able to listen to a curated playlist to make you feel like a calm human being with super stable emotions. That's why the Lo-fi Beats To Study and Relax To girl is such an inspiration to me. She is a hard worker who is unphased by the chaos, madness, and confusion of the world around her. She can study and relax simultaneously, and I deeply re…

Animals can be hilarious without even trying. From elephants attending the funerals of the people they've killed to ducks going to the pub , animals can get into absolutely absurd situations without anyone's help. Nobody knows how or why they got there, but you wish they could tell you about it. When I was a kid, I had a dog named Bear, one of the most intelligent animals I've ever met. One time, we left him in his crate at home, and when we returned, we couldn't believe what he did. Not only d…

Being “random” used to really get you places in society. In the 2000s, randomness was a socially currenency the likes of which we had never seen before, and will probably never

It's nice to participate in the simple pleasures in life once and a while. Sure, these things might not be expensive or high class or highly memorable, but they add a little extra something to your day to make it stand out. So often, our days feel like they're running together, one day looking practically identical to the rest. When you're living for the weekend, making the week feel like it counts as a part of your actual life can be challenging. Incorporating little unique things into each da…

One of the best things about memes is they aren't going anywhere anytime soon. It doesn't seem like memes are in danger of extinction, but you never know. As a kid, I was anxious about the entire internet deleting itself in a burning of the Library of Alexandria-esque crisis. This dilemma kept me up at night; If the internet got deleted, how would I watch the newest episode of Annoying Orange and Charlie the Unicorn? As I've grown older, I've found much more reasonable end-of-the-world scenario…

Unique pet names are such a joy. There's nothing worse than meeting an animal who has the most basic uncreative name you could think of. As a child, I went to the neighbor kids' house, thrilled to find out they had guinea pigs. However, my glee subsided when I found out the horrid truth. They named their white guinea pig Snowball, their brown guinea pig Hershey, and their black and white guinea pig Oreo. That is an abomination. How could you be so uncreative to name a pet the most obvious thing…

Old McDonald had a farm, EIEIO. And on that farm, he had some memes EIEIO. Well, we've got plenty more memes where that came from. Old McDonald may have had an oink-oink here and an oink-oink there, but he did not have an extensive list of side-splitting animal memes. Sure, Old McDonald might've posted some memes (that he printed out) onto the side of the barn, but the only ones who saw them were the cows, the chickens, and the common house cat. Here, we've got memes for all animal fans. Are yo…

At least it was funny

Wikipedia ; the fountain of forbidden knowledge. Is it accurate? Is it all made up? Who cares! Wikipedia was founded in 2001 and has been an essential tool for researchers of the online persuasion ever since. If you grew up in the 2000s, you remember being told by your teachers not to use Wikipedia unless you want to get a big fat F on your paper. That threat put the fear of God into many young Wikipedia users. Although not peer-reviewed in the technical sense, Wikipedia is a very convenient so…

Not acceptable

We're at that time of the week again. The bulk of the work week is over, the weekend is just on the horizon, and you're officially over the hump. Whether you're checking out the local honky tonk, sampling some grape and orange soda from an old okie smokey fountain, or going out and buying yourself a diamond-encrusted bolo tie, you never know what the magic of Thursday can bring. You know exactly what Natasha Lyonne meant when she said, "Thursday, what a concept." Do you know what the wonder and…

Some ridiculous diagnoses

There's not much in this world that we can count on. Except for maybe dogs. These tail-wagging best friends of “man” make life brighter for everyone, including people who don't own them. I know that when I

What are they like?

Your business = your dog's business