Such a beautiful name for a girl

Disney is addicted to acquiring properties. From Pixar to Star Wars to Avatar , they've got some pretty high-profile brands in their wheelhouse. Unfortunately, there is one Disney property that has been so underused it's almost criminal. I'm talking, of course, about our felt friends, the Muppets. Disney acquired the Muppets in 2004, and they haven't done squat with them since! Sure, we got the 2011 movie The Muppets and the less successful sequel Muppets Most Wanted , but you'd think they woul…

Turns out this magical experience looks more like a creepy missing persons warehouse when the lights are turned on…

The Mouse loves memes

Happy New Year, Disney nerds! 2023 is upon us, and I, for one, am excited about what the new year has to offer regarding Disney projects. The movie I am most excited about has got to be the remake of The Little Mermaid starring Halle Bailey. I may or may not have watched the pirated videos of her singing ‘Part of Your World’ from the D23 Expo, and I have never had so many chills from hearing somebody singing anything. I know that Halle is going to knock it out of the park, and I am so excited t…

Disney Adults are one of the most oppressed groups in the world today. Well, not necessarily, but they do get a lot of slack for the mere crime of liking a theme park. Sure, maybe wearing mouse ears and crying when you meet Donald Duck is “cringe” by the standards of conventional society, but within the gates of Disneyland, it's

Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, all the creatures were stirring, especially The Mouse TM . It's no secret that the holiday season is the craziest time of the year to go to Disney theme parks. School is out for the kids, and parents have PTO to burn before it expires at the end of the year. The best part of going to Disney for Christmas is escaping the winter vortexes of Northern and non-Floridian cities. The worst part? The lines: Everywhere you go, the people, the c…

It's finally happening. The new Avatar movie is out in theaters, and all of us Pandora: The World of Avatar Fans are laughing in the faces of the naysayers. Everybody thought Disney was crazy for making a theme park based on Avatar. Everyone said over and over again that “Avatar has not cultural relevance” and “nobody remembers anything about Avatar,” but they were wrong.

Do any of you all remember the Peter Pandom ; the massive group of Tumblr fangirls who were obsessed with the actors who played Peter Pan at Disneyland? It was one of those phenomena that, upon reflection, feels like something I hallucinated when I had the swine flu. Do y'all remember the swine flu? Those were the days. Anyways, the fandom relied on teens who would go to Disneyland for the expressed purpose of telling Peter Pan all about their mental health issues. These fangirls would film the…

This is Halloween! This is Halloween! Pumpkins scream in the dead of night. This is Halloween, everybody make a scene. Trick or treat 'til the neighbors gonna die of fright. It's our town, everybody scream in this town of Halloween! Disney always does Halloween right. The next time I go to Disney World, I want to go during the Halloween season. There are a bunch of cute seasonal additions to the park, and unlike Christmas, there are not 100,000 people in the parks. Even if you take the theme pa…

Of all of the billion-dollar corporations, there is none with better brand recognition than Disney. How could there be? Do you think Apple could make timeless animated classics, less timeless live-action flicks, incredible theme parks, and Twitches ? I don't think so. Disney has convinced millions of people to wear their logo as merchandise. Google could literally never. Disney has got people consuming its products from their first days on this green earth to their dying moments, and no offense…

Zero chill

“Mickey, you've made a terrible mistake…”

They're not just interpreters, they're performers and it really shows during their signing of Disney World's Beauty and the Beast.

Look. We know that a lot of people love Disney. As a kid, you're basically trained to want to go to one of their tricked out amusement parks. You want to see Goofy's goofiness up close, meet a princess in a floofy gown, and stand in line for over an hour with your disgruntled parents who would rather be drinking. After a while you grow up, and while you do want to go to Disneyland for some rides, you also want to spend more time at the Trader Sam's tiki bar, drinking until you get into an explo…

Disney adults can get absolutely insane; simply ungovernable. When they want a picture with their beloved Disney character, they better get that dang picture or else.