Sage advice

Everything's much more annoying

Did she ask??

You're (probably) not at death's door

Youth does not last forever, and for many people, that is unforgivable. This week, Twitter user @thenorthmens went viral after posting two pictures of Leonardo DiCaprio: one in the 90s and one now, with the caption, “twink death is a terrifying thing.” If you didn't know, a twink is a slim, young, and hairless gay man. You might think, “but Leonardo DiCaprio does not fit into that category at any age!” You would be correct, but that matters very little to Twitter users. Twitter users will call…

Every morning I wake up to my iPhone's alarm and proceed to do all my silly little tasks until 9 pm when the cycle starts over again. When I was a kid, I had no idea how much of my day would be filled with annoying responsibilities. Feeding the cat is one thing, but I never thought I'd spend so much of my precious time wiping down surfaces. Whoever made those damn wipes was a genius. A genius, who unlike me, is probably free from the shackles of a 2-hour commute. Or, you know, dead. Anyway. The…

As a woman in her mid-thirties, the number of ads I get for anti-aging miracles is pretty preposterous. They even rival ads for egg-freezing services. Unfortunately, for most of my life, I've been largely ignorant of the importance of a solid skincare routine. Though my genetics have treated me well up til now, my skin is often dull, the fine lines are starting to form and I still get the occasional breakout. As the reality of my mortality and aging skin started nagging at me, I started dabblin…

The list is long

Oof

68 going on 25

Like clockwork

Thirty flirty and surviving

Turning 30 years old is a significant accomplishment. It means the three stupidest decades of your life are over, and you can finally start being a real adult with an actual frontal cortex. While most 20-year-olds are in similar life situations (having horrible service jobs, slugging through college, praying their fake ID won't get taken away), one 30-year-old can be in a very different place in life than the next. Some people are married, own a house, and have three kids by age thirty. I'm 22,…

It hurts.

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