911

So, a very upset Englishman had a problem that would only happen in your nightmares.

His girlfriend let the cat eat his bacon and he desperately wants the police to come in and assert some justice. His suffering cannot be measured and has sent shockwaves across the globe for those who crave righteousness for such a heinous situation.

News outlets are reporting it even over the pond.:

An Englishman called the emergency line for the West Yorkshire Police recently to report that his girlfriend had let his feline eat his bacon. And not only that, but he wanted to move forward with charges on both the kitty and the girlfriend.

Here's a video that includes the audio of that very important emergency phone call in question:

If this man cannot find justice, where does it exist in the world?

Build-A-Bear's hastily-deleted tweet was just one of several brands caught in the act of turning one of the most deadly attacks on American soil into a chance to promote their #brand with #sales on Twitter. That doesn't even compare to these four though. Here's Intimacy Box, a lingerie company, who had the gumption to even get the date of the attack wrong:



CVS couldn't resist slapping their corporate logo on their sentimentality (via Seth Fiegerman):



Of course, what better way to think about and honor 9/11 than from a company that makes prosthetic fappable lady-bits:



And finally, here's a series of tweets (via Brandon Wall) from a Bikram Yoga studio in Arlington, VA:



Bikram Yoga eventually apologized for any insensitivity, but not before laying down the Loose Change conspiracy nonsense and a healthy lack of Basic Human Dignity.