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Let's be clear: Outside of the literal interpretation of the conjunction of these two symbols, the iPad is in no way, shape or form a thing even remotely as good as an actual apple pie. - Matty Malaprop

Either way, it sure does look Sheik! - Matty Malaprop

Gently down the... protein? I don't know how to rewrite that classic tune in science terms I'M SORRY SORRY EVERYONE I KNOW I'VE FAILED YOU ALL. - Matty Malaprop

What is this, Planar Chaos? Everyone knows Mana Leak costs 1U! And the idea of a green counterspell is just nonsense! Total color pie fail! - Matty Malaprop

If said root was in the shape of an "I," then would that make this tree an imaginary lumber? - Matty Malaprop

They're still more stable than the cars Axl, if you ask me. - Matty Malaprop

I was gonna make a joke blending eating utensils and metal music for this write-up, but fork it. - Matty Malaprop

I don't wanna spoil anything, but I hear he gets towed at the end. - Matty Malaprop

You think just whine because they are begging for food. But in fact they whine because they're calculating the coefficient AND begging for food. - Matty Malaprop

When it comes to getting your daily dose of grains, I can think of no better food to ingest than Methamphetawheat. - Matty Malaprop

If you think Magnum's looking good, then you should see how well those old doberman PInschers at the Robin's Nest aged! - Matty Malaprop

Believe it or not, Buddhist Bale IS in this picture! He is simply symbolized by nothing. - Matty Malaprop

The best-laid plans of mice and men... are totally and completely FABULOUS! - Matty Malaprop

Or in the words of Wu-Tang, "ya'll better protrek ya holodeck!" - Matty Malaprop