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One percent of people notice 99 percent of all grammar and spelling errors on the interwebs. #OccupyMerriam-Webster - Matty Malaprop

I remember one time in college when I saw a "Leggo my Eggo!" commercial after having just finished a paper on Friedrich Nietzsche, and in my state of post-essay exhaustion I misheard the quote as "Leggo my Ego!" and was thoroughly creeped out and confused. #CoolStoryBro - Matty Malaprop

At least I'm not getting arrested, like a certain former Dell spokesperson... - Matty Malaprop

... and behind that man is soon to be ex-girlfriend. - Matty Malaprop

You can't prevent the ever-increasing data plan charges though, so don't even bother getting your hopes up. - Matty Malaprop

Or any of its "thrill rides," for that matter. - Matty Malaprop

After looking at this pun and spending half an hour trying to come up with some appropriate commentary, all I can bring myself to say is that the Tylenol in the image above seems awfully appealing right now... - Matty Malaprop

If you don't vote Trump in 2012, the U.S. economy is going to have hell toupée. - Matty Malaprop

I'd congratulate your for you punmanship but I'm too busy giggling over the idea of Tingle condoms because I'm 12. - Matty Malaprop

Damn shame. I'm far more fond of half-and-half in my morning cup of joe. - Matty Malaprop