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So it attracts mutts to men like Axe attracts obscene amounts of money to miserable advertisements? - Matty Malaprop

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Sure, you're paying more than $2,000 for a burger. But have you ever eaten another burger in your life that allowed you to emulate the original Oregon Trail? I DIDN'T THINK SO! - Matty Malaprop

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A Humorously Mild Taste of LaCroix Tweets

Sparkling water is a decisive topic. Some appreciate a light alternative to juice and soda, and everyone else demands to know where the flavor is. It's hard for many of us to spend money on a product whose selling point is that there's almost nothing in it, and that generates some pretty hilarious complaints. For more twitter stuff, here are funny tweets to give that day a boost.

Funny tweets about LaCroix sparkling water | Mike Ingram @mikeingram00 guess question have people who love LaCroix is have tried any other beverages 13 Feb Mike Ingram @mikeingram00 LaCroix tastes like made by society which flavor is scarcest natural resource 2:03 PM Feb 14, 2018 8 8 See Mike Ingram's other Tweets
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One time in French class in high school, a peer of mine told the class she almost shat herself the last time she got scared by a movie. Our teacher was shocked to hear one of her pupil's swearing, until said classmate convinced her that she had meant to say "chat" (French for cat) instead.

This story has very little to do with this video. But I decided to tell it anyway, so you're welcome! - Matty Malaprop

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Fighting internet unfunniness crime, one shoop at a time. - Matty Malaprop

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When you're balding, but you still wanna dress the part for that upcoming Rancid concert, you need MOGAINE (tm). - Matty Malaprop

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Do you think this magical drink was brewed up by a Hot Sauce Committee? - Matty Malaprop

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And all this time, here I was thinking R&B stood for rhythm and blues, when in fact it means rutabagas and beets! - Matty Malaprop

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The only difference is that sweet chai is actually good, which is more than can be said of GnR... - Matty Malaprop

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It's a great snack to take with you on all guacs of life! - Matty Malaprop

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As if the end of the roll wasn't already hard enough to find! - Matty Malaprop