He barks all night and he sleeps all day!
... it's actually really annoying, to be quite honest with you. - Matty Malaprop
OHMYGODUGUIZ I GOT IT. I AM LEGEND-AS-MUSICAL A LA DR. HORRIBLE'S SINGALONG BLOG. WE'RE ALL GONNA BE RICH PUNMASTERS. RICH! - Matty Malaprop
Not even gonna lie, I spent roughly the latter 2/3 of the movie waiting for everyone to just UP AND DIE ALREADY. - Matty Malaprop
On the EVE of Black Friday, 2805, everything changed... - Matty Malaprop
Q: How to you make the Teletubbies even creepier?
A: Have them recite such works as "Hop-Frog" and "The Telltale Heart" while prancing around in their already vaguely sexual and inappropriate way.
... aaaaaaaaaaand QED. - Matty Malaprop
Everyone treated the monster as though it was a bumbling buffoon, but w/r/t intelligence, such opinions really are just relative. - Matty Malaprop
He's the pop star our nation deserves, but not the one it meeps right now. - Matty Malaprop
You know, smash things into pieces like Hogan's career. - Matty Malaprop
Listen, I'm not saying that I secretly want all orphans to be sucked up into tornadoes and never seen again, but... OKAY YEAH FINE THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I'M SAYING. - Matty Malaprop
Beneath all the bass drops, his songs are all really just hopeless love ballads to one Lisa Simpson. - Matty Malaprop
[knock knock] Ash! [knock knock] Ash! [knock knock] Ash! ... etc. - Matty Malaprop