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Say what you will about the OS itself, but let me be the first to say that the Blue Screen of Death does WONDERS keeping the bugs out of your apartment. - Matty Malaprop

It's an experiment about nothing! - Matty Malaprop

Once you've finished devouring the first book in the series, you get to dive right into the dessert that is the sequel: Game of (Ice Cream) Cones. - Matty Malaprop

Let's be clear: Outside of the literal interpretation of the conjunction of these two symbols, the iPad is in no way, shape or form a thing even remotely as good as an actual apple pie. - Matty Malaprop

Fighting internet unfunniness crime, one shoop at a time. - Matty Malaprop

Is your grasp on awakeness starting to get a little Slippy? A cup of our fresh-brewed java will have you Peppy in no time! - Matty Malaprop

A great taste that won't disappoint, no matter your creed! - Matty Malaprop

The plot for the game is truly amazing. Gere begins his journey living happily in Chicago, but things turn ugly when old friends he though were merely An Officer and a Gentleman reveal themselves to be an Ocelot and a Snake. - Matty Malaprop

Seriously, Facebook addicts have trigger fingers that could beat Meta Knight on expert mode 10 times out of 10. - Matty Malaprop

Is that anything like rocket jumping? - Matty Malaprop

When it comes to getting your daily dose of grains, I can think of no better food to ingest than Methamphetawheat. - Matty Malaprop

I'd like to order four large supremes -- hold the mushrooms -- with extra Sarlacc. Name's Boba Fett. - Matty Malaprop