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Seriously, Facebook addicts have trigger fingers that could beat Meta Knight on expert mode 10 times out of 10. - Matty Malaprop

I don't specifically know what would constitute performing an action in life LIKE A BIOS, but if it means I potentially defrag-ing all the mistakes I make on a daily basis, then I feel like I really, really need to figure it out. - Matty Malaprop

What? No, I wasn't being creepy! I mean, have you seen her performance in Hard Candy? She's really quite fantastic in that film! - Matty Malaprop

I think I would have enjoyed elementary school much more if Evil Knievel had been my bus driver. - Matty Malaprop

Learn more about being a boss here!